Make an Appointment: [email protected] | 336-547-6523

  • Tips from a North Carolina Therapist for Building Your Self-Esteem This Summer

    Many people struggle with insecurity. However during the summer, it can be especially challenging. Ads and marketing about getting “summer ready” can cause us to doubt ourselves and our appearance.  And make our inner critic louder than usual.  In this blog post, we will discuss some tips for building your self-esteem this summer. Through self-acceptance and compassion you can learn to love yourself here and now!

    Practicing Self-Care to Build Your Self-Esteem

    Self-care is always important, especially when you’re struggling with your self-esteem. When you don’t feel good about yourself, it can be hard to take care of yourself and meet your needs. But unfortunately, this will only make things worse. See, it’s a cycle. When you don’t feel good about yourself, you neglect yourself, then you feel worse about yourself, and so on. 

    Photo of a woman holding a yoga mat and making a peace sign representing how therapy for self-esteem can help you feel more comfortable in your body.

    That is why it’s so important to do things for yourself that make you happy. It doesn’t have to be anything big. Just something that brings you joy. For example, it could be taking a long bath, painting, or going for a walk on the beach at Oak Island.

    Try doing at least one thing for yourself each day. With practice, it’ll get easier to build self-care into your routine.

    Practicing Self-Compassion

    One of the best things you can do for yourself is to show yourself compassion. Self-compassion is being kind to yourself, but it’s also so much more. It’s understanding that you’re not perfect and forgiving yourself when you make mistakes.

    Self-compassion can be thought of as being your own best friend. How would you talk to your best friend if they were feeling insecure? You would probably be pretty understanding and comforting, right? You might tell them that they are beautiful just the way they are. And that they are so much more than that too! You might remind them of how smart, kind, and creative they are. That’s how you should talk to yourself too.

    Using a Gratitude Journal

    Photo of a woman journaling. This photo represents how gratitude journals can help people with low self esteem learn to love themselves.

    A great way to put self-compassion into practice is to keep a gratitude journal. This is where you write down things that you’re grateful for. It can be anything, big or small.

    For instance, you could write down that you’re grateful for your health, your family, your friends, your job, or your pets. It may start with these external forces, but eventually you may start to see how grateful you are for YOURSELF too. Perhaps you were grateful that you set a boundary and didn’t come in to work on your day off. Or that you left a toxic relationship.

    Keeping a gratitude journal is a great method that I recommend to my clients. It helps them to remember all of the good things in their lives and focus on the positive, instead of getting “stuck” on the negative. 

    If You Struggle With Low Self-Esteem, Try Not to Avoid Your Feelings

    As a therapist who specializes in self-esteem, I know just how challenging it can be to cope with insecurity and negative thoughts about yourself.  You may want to avoid them and just pretend they’re not there. But, avoidance will only make things worse in the long run. It’s important to feel your feelings and work through them.

    For example, you may like going to the beach but struggle with wearing swimwear because you feel uncomfortable about your body. That feeling is okay. In fact, many people struggle with it. The key is to not avoid those feelings by avoiding going to the beach or wearing swim wear. Instead, take small steps and practice getting more comfortable with it.

    Try to find a swimsuit that you feel comfortable in. Maybe the first day at the beach you wear it with a cover-up or with a towel wrapped around you. Then the next day you might try swimming in the ocean with it on. Slowly you may find that it becomes easier to enjoy wearing it without thinking about your body. 

    You deserve to enjoy the beach just like everyone else!

    Focus on the Here and Now Through Mindfulness

    One of the best things that you can do for your self-esteem is to focus on the here and now. This means that you should live in the present moment instead of dwelling on the past. Or, worrying about the future. It can be challenging to be present, as we all get stuck on the past from time to time. But it’s so important.

    When you focus on the present, you can appreciate all of the good things that are happening in your life right now. Being mindful in the moment can also help you to forget about your worries or insecurities. 

    Savor the Moment

    Photo of four friends walking together representing how therapy for self esteem in NC can help you feel more confident and at peace.

    To demonstrate, if you’re at your favorite restaurant with your friends, take a moment to look around and appreciate where you are and who you’re with. Smell the food, feel the warmth of the sun, and enjoy the conversation. Maybe even write it down in your gratitude journal later. This can help you to leave behind your worries and move toward the things that matter. 

    “Doubt Your Self Doubts”

    One final tip I want to share with you is to “doubt your self-doubts”. This means that when you have a negative thought about yourself, take a step back and question it. Is it really true? Or is it just your inner critic talking? 

    By taking a step back from your inner critic, you may even realize that your inner critic isn’t always you. It can be an outside voice that you internalized at some point in your life. A voice of a family member, past friend, or a silly ad you saw on TV. Just remember, there is a compassionate voice inside of you that knows the truth.

    You don’t have to be your own worst critic. You can learn how to question your insecurities and accept yourself, even love yourself, just the way you are. 

    Begin Therapy for Self-Esteem in North Carolina

    Photo of a girl on her computer which represents online self-esteem therapy in Greensboro, NC.

    As a therapist, I work with a lot of people who are struggling with their self-esteem. You may feel like you’re the only one that feels this way, but you truly are not alone. So many people are in a similar place as you right now. I want you to know that if you’re feeling low right now, it doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you. It simply means that you need a bit of support.

    Many people weren’t taught how to show themselves compassion and acceptance. Self-esteem therapy can teach you the tools you need to build a practice of self-care and self-love. If you’re interested in beginning therapy,  you can follow these steps:

    1. Submit a contact form on my website
    2. Learn more about my therapy services and how self-esteem therapy can help you
    3. Gain support as you overcome your inner critic and start living a more fulfilling life

    Other Services Offered with Michele Seeley LCMHC

    I understand that if you’re struggling with low-self esteem, you might be experiencing other mental health challenges too. Perhaps you have anxiety about being in public or socializing. Or, maybe you’re dealing with depression which makes it difficult to practice self-care. If your low self-esteem is affecting your relationship, I also offer individual relationship counseling too.

    While my therapy practice is based in North Carolina, I can offer my therapy services to anyone located in North Carolina and Florida through online therapy. If you have questions about my services or how therapy can help you, please don’t hesitate to reach out. I would be honored to be a part of your journey towards healing and peace.